08 Zář Part 3 – First lesson – the personality of the trainer

In the first two parts of this article, we covered everything you should be looking for when searching for a new trainer. You have taken everything into consideration, gotten a recommendation, and taken your time to find someone qualified and compatible with you and your dog. 

By now, you have set the date of your first session and are anxiously driving towards the training field, curious how it will turn out, excited to learn something new, and determined to give your best.

The first personal meeting, the first session with your new trainer, will give you plenty of information you might not be able to get online or over the phone. Like I always say: be mindful. Pay attention to details and make sure you’ve found the right trainer, someone you can work with long-term. 

Here are some things you should look out for. I have broken it down into two articles. First, we will cover the personality of the trainer, and next, we will analyze the training itself.

• First and foremost, a teacher. This is probably the most important point in this list. Your trainer should be a teacher. His personality, his attitude, his way of thinking should be that of a teacher. 

Sadly, not every great dog handler has what it takes to train others. Participating in (or even winning) the world championship doesn’t ensure the ability to pass along the knowledge, know-how, and experiences to others. Your trainer must have this ability. It is crucial. 

I know many great handlers, world-class competitors with beautiful obedience routines. But when you ask them about something, how they train it, how they work on it, they are unable to explain it in any coherent manner that you could learn something from. 

And please understand, this doesn’t mean they are stupid or can’t communicate well. It’s just that not everyone is cut out to be a teacher.

Look for this. Observe your new trainer. Listen to how he talks. Is he able to explain things well? In different ways, multiple times, comprehensively and accurately? Do you feel like he can really transmit thoughts from his mind to yours? Does he care whether or not you fully understand what he is saying? 

That’s what you need. You want to learn, you need a teacher.

• Carrot and stick. Now don’t worry, I am not talking about how the trainer should approach dog training. I do believe in balanced training, but regardless of that, this point applies to any trainer. 

It’s not about the approach to your dog, it’s about the approach to yourself as the handler. A good trainer should be able to use both the carrot and the stick, both compliments, praise and assurements, as well as constructive criticism, playful jabs, and pressure. 

You don’t want someone who just praises you the whole time. How are you supposed to get better without knowing what’s wrong? You also don’t want someone who criticizes you all the time. Where’s the fun in that? You want someone who can accurately judge how far he can push you and how much he can praise you to make you work your hardest. To really bring out the best from inside you. 

Believe me, this is not easy. A trainer has to feel their way around, get to know what kind of person you are, and then utilize that to help you effectively. Watch out for this. If your trainer is unable to do this, you probably won’t work together well.

• You “click” and get along well. If you will choose this trainer and decide to work with him long-term, you guys are going to spend some significant time together. I remember when I was starting out I used to joke that I spent more time with my trainer than with my girlfriend. 

If you commit to spending this much time with someone, you should at least get along, have compatible personalities. If you can’t stand spending ten minutes with him without wanting to be anywhere else (or kill him, yourself, or anybody else to get a break), it’s not a good fit. No amount of training success will make up for this.

You don’t have to be best buddies, but you’ve got to at least get along well. 

• Doesn’t think he is above others. You don’t want a trainer who is full of himself. It’s good when he is confident in his abilities. But if he constantly belittles you for not knowing something or makes sarcastic remarks, rolls his eyes, mumbles and generally makes you feel stupid or (God forbid!) bad mouths your dog  – that’s a red flag. 

You need someone who remembers what it was like to be a beginner, what it was like to not know anything. Not someone who tells you that his dog would never do something like that or that you are a bad handler. He needs to be able to put himself into your position and lift you up, not push you down. 

This person is supposed to lead you and your dog to greatness, not make you doubt yourselves.

• Never says anything bad about your dog. To build on the previous point: it is never a trainer’s place to say anything bad about your dog. It baffles me how many times I have heard from my clients, “Yeah, my previous trainer told me to sell my dog. Said that he will never be good at obedience.” 

Excuse me, but what the hell?! How can someone who takes money from dog handlers say something like this?! 

There were times I thought to myself that this particular dog just doesn’t have what it takes to do obedience. I informed the client that it will be hard work and that the result might not be ideal. But I would never, ever dare tell anyone their best friend is no good. It isn’t my place as a trainer to determine if it’s worth investing time and effort into a dog. 

I can tell a client that their eight-year-old overweight and lazy labrador who is on his first-ever obedience lesson probably won’t be able to get a title. But if they want to work with him anyway and genuinely try to do their best, who am I to tell them their dog isn’t worth it? 

If you get any remarks about having the “wrong breed,” too old a dog, or an unsuitable dog, get the hell out of there. Your dog is amazing! You know that, and your trainer should know that, too.

• Patient. You will make plenty of mistakes, especially if you’re a beginner. You will repeat those mistakes. Everybody does. I do it. You will forget part of what you already learned. You won’t understand exactly, and therefore you will make more mistakes.

This is normal. We are people, not robots. Everybody makes mistakes. There will be things you will struggle with. Some parts, some aspects of the training, will be difficult for you to grasp or utilize. That’s normal, too! 

Your trainer should know this, and he should be patient with you. If he flips out over every little mistake or gets impatient when you don’t learn as fast as he would want you to, that’s bad. 

You don’t want to feel stressed out when working with your dog. You want to feel understood and supported, especially during the challenging moments

Being a trainer is hard. I said that in one of the previous articles of this series, and maybe after reading this one you have a better idea of how hard it really is. Don’t be too harsh in your judgment of your new trainer, but at the same time do not let anyone incompetent near your dog. Be mindful and I am sure you will make the right choice. 

Next time, we will talk about how the training itself should be conducted to make it effective and enjoyable for both you and your dog.